veggies or bust

recently, i have discovered that there is a serious hole in my life! a hole that can only be filled with brussels sprouts and kale.

it all started when i made a little job change.  i went from the 9-5 deal to the world of evening shifts to pursue the typical hostess by night, actress by day (and all other hours) lifestyle. so, ultimately my schedule is far from normal.  the biggest challenge has become my food consumption.  the sudden lack of veggies and little to no time allotted for cooking is throwing me for a loop.  i get up later now, eat a brunch type thing when i feel like it, have a snack involving a ‘must eat something before work so i don’t pass out’ mindset, usually involving something fast and never including any sort of leafy greens. then i get home, its late and i am too tired to cook, so i throw together yet another snack of unhealthiness…sigh! something needs to change. i am having veggie withdrawals!

the light bulb went off last week when i found myself wandering around portland’s farmers market with a girl friend who put my choice of a gluten free muffin to shame in comparison to her organic apple. suddenly i was jealous of her beautiful, crisp apple, (what is going on here?) i realized that i am making all the wrong foodie choices and depriving myself of yummy goodness. organic and beautiful veggies abound (all at outrageous prices to fit the tree hugging, all-natural trend of portlanders) should be taken advantage of.  i shouldn’t be passing up all of the local wonderful-ness in exchange for a gluten free treat that to be honest, wasn’t all that satisfying.

time to step up my game! i cannot allow the crazy new schedule to win. so, how am i going to do this? buy veggies, use veggies, enjoy the veggies! maybe i will even jump in on this whole juice craze. although i do not plan to live on juice alone, i cannot argue that some green apple, lime, ginger, spinach, kale, parsley, cucumber, and celery liquid concoction won’t do some amazing things for my body, i’m just not willing to give up food in whole form and cheese spreads just yet!

so cheers to healthy deliciousness and making the choice to not eat popcorn and french fries!

xoxo

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getting my bake on

i have been doing a lot of baking lately! i’d like to blame it on the fact that i have the perfect peaches. peaches that would make an amazing cream peach pie (my favorite) and i just cannot waste such deliciousness, but in reality, it comes down to the necessity of a distraction. distraction from the fact that i haven’t been auditioning all that much lately and i need to keep from calling my agent and venting about the lack of 18-22 year old roles, or the whole rampage of “what is wrong with me, why don’t they like me??” ugh! i can’t take it any longer. so to pass the time and to keep from annoying my poor agent, i have been putting my tiny kitchen and gluten free flours to good use!

it’s an audition dry spell and i am not happy about it, but it’s all part of the roller-coaster. i am dying when i am waiting to hear about a callback, dying to be put on ‘avail’, dying if i am released from ‘avail’, dying (of happiness) if i booking the job and dying if i hear nothing … i become a train wreck!  i can’t think about or talk about anything else, i drive everyone around me crazy. yet, on the other hand i am dying when i am not auditioning. my life revolves around auditions. am i getting enough, am i doing them well, do they like me, why didn’t i book the role, how can i be better?  it is all very tumultuous. luckily i have finally found a way to to ease the stress of it all (not 100% efficient but i found that this mindset leads to less tears and fewer self-destructive thoughts), i have to take a step back and not take it personally.  my job is to get the callback and if that happens, i have done my job well. from there it is up to the director, the client and/or network to pick me (fingers crossed). so while i am waiting for either an audition or a call i bake and bake and then i eat.

hmmmmmm time to pass the goodies off to some friends, having such yumminess at hand is dangerous.

summer adventuring

summer has finally graced the northwest with its’ presence… just in time for fall to sweep in and steal the show. with only a handful of sunny days worthy of a sundress, good times must be had and fast before the rain settles in for the next 10 months! so with the sun shining and the “record-breaking” heat, we had ourselves some awesome fun.

first and foremost, any day that involves my polaroid camera is a good day! i love my old school polaroids and film – even if my friends do take to teasing me about how funny it is that i have no idea what digital media is (i DO… i have an iPhone and an instagram account, i just like the real stuff better. one day they will thank me!)

first thing on the agenda… mimosas!

next up, its time for the crawfish festival!

follow it all with a portland style block party and you have a mighty fine summer day! yay summer, yay friends and yay polaroids! without these, life would be much less enjoyable and much less memorable.

thank you portland for some much-needed sunshine and adventures!

xx

the slings and arrows of outrageous anticipation…

here is a little story about my first role on television…  i had been dreaming of this day for years and years.  landing a role of any merit and being able to call myself a real live “working actor” was all that i talked about, thought about and dreamt about.  a role on TV would be hitting the big time and from there i would be unstoppable.

it all started months ago when i went in to my millionth audition, this round, it was for a 17 year old cheerleader on an episode of TNT’s ‘leverage’.  17 i am not.  and since the only schools i had ever attended were art schools, the closest i have ever come to a cheerleader was my teenage obsession with ‘bring it on’ but hey, i wanted this role, i was made for this role, and i was going to kill my audition leaving them no choice but to book me… and much to my surprise i booked the job!

the first day on the set of ‘leverage’ was the biggest day of my life! excited beyond belief, i show up for my first day doing my darnedest to remain cool, calm and collected (i’m now a professional, remember?), spent a lot of time in my trailer waiting, going over and over lines, sneaking a peak outside from time to time and hoping i was doing everything ‘right’. then came the knock on my little door… time to go.  i pile into the oversized van and sit there script in hand trying to smile through my fear and holding back the screams of excitement.  then the leads of the show pile in… ohmigosh! this is really happening! finally, 3 blocks later, we arrive at set (i guess actors can’t be trusted to walk?).  it’s cold in the basement, huddling in corner in my giant parka next to the mini heater i am given a nugget of advice from the stars, “listen and have fun.”

wheeeeee let the games begin! between takes i have to pinch myself to remember that this is actually happening… i am laughing with the cast and crew… i am in with the cool kids! sadly the four days of filming in the magic wonderland went by too fast and i was thrown back into the ‘real world’ where i have a day job and my green tea and veggie scramble isn’t brought to the hair and make-up trailer while my hair goes from bed-head to fabulous and my face suddenly has a healthy glow to it. ugh! the real world sucks.

annnyyyyywayyy… last weekend marked the debut of my face in the little screen and i have never been a bigger bundle of nerves.  i wanted to watch the episode, i didn’t want to watch the episode, i did, i didn’t… i did?  ah!  what if i look fat or was all acty or what if i was terrible or what if they cut out all of my scenes? it was a never ending flurry of freaking outs, anxiety and excitement.  in the end i was convinced by my very supportive friends and boyfriend that the only thing to do was drink some bubbly, eat delicious cheese and watch my little mile marker.  the time came for us all to settle down in front of the television and although i wanted to ostrich my head into the carpet i was actually watchable, yay.  no tears, no agony and no overwhelming embarrassment… i survived!

waaa-baaam! i’m finally a real life actor.

a little celebration

last night, the finale to a wonderful weekend was a little ‘family’ dinner of perfection! celebrating a television debut and a birthday called for an amazing cheese spread, chilled bubbly, red wine, summer salads, mini cakes and of course the best of friends. nothing beats a get-together full of laughter, great conversation and amazing food! lucky to be surrounded by love and happiness… here’s to the promise of exciting adventures and more dinner parties.

celebration_dinner2

“hello” blogging world!

i’m an actress, and for for those of you who haven’t had the opportunity to sit around praying, hoping and wishing for that next big audition or great news from your agent… it isn’t all that glamourous. in fact, it is the closest to insanity that you can get without being committed or medicated! but what can i say, i LOVE it. can’t live without it (does that in fact make me crazy??)

what does an actor do when they aren’t acting you might ask? well i’m here to tell you that between the auditions and jobs there is a lot of waiting… and then there is more waiting. and maybe some crying. the goal is to have hobbies and to perfect the art of distraction. so what i have created here is a little blog about my life. life as an actress when I am not acting. and maybe a little of when i am… it’s a taste of me!

hope that you enjoy

xo

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